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Friday, June 19, 2009

no, I will not

No, I will not write your resume objective for you. If you don't know your objective, I certainly don't, and anyway, I don't even believe in resume objectives.

No, I will not give you the answer for your school paper. You should probably do some research.

No, I will not critique your resume for you. People charge hundreds of dollars to do that. (Actually, I do sometimes do this for people who tell me an interesting or compelling story. But not as a rule.)

No, I will not promote your company's product or news release. Really?

Stop asking me those things.

I will do the following: tell you what your manager is probably thinking, tell you if your manager sucks, tell you if you sound like you're the one who sucks, tell you how to handle your annoying coworker, tell you whether or not you really want that job, and so forth. That's pretty much all.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

What, you mean you don't have the time or desire to wade through misspellings, typos, cliched metaphors, and inflated job descriptions?

C'mon, it'll be fun! ; )

DrJohnDrozdal said...

At fairly frequent intervals, I will get calls from people who want my advice about becoming an independent consultant. I always tell each one the same things: Get so clear on what it is you will do as a consultant that you can explain it in less than one minute in a way that everyone can understand; and get clear on what you don't do so you can say, "No" to some requests.

You rock! I wish everyone could be as clear as you are about what you will do and what you will not do. Great example for everyone.

Evil HR Lady said...

Heh. Do you also not allow people to "guest blog" for you? I get tons of those requests. "Hi, I'm Samantha from [some lame new HR service]. Can I write a guest blog for you?"

One look at my blog will tell you I don't do guest posts, and I certainly don't do advertised guest posts.

Although, if you wanted to guest blog, I'd let you.

Deirdre HR Maven said...

You don't think this will stop the inquiries, do you? This is for 'other people' - you know, not the special people who will continue to ask....

HRD said...

Send them over my way. I'm always happy to help.

It will be a top class product....honest!

They won't ask twice.......

Office Humorist said...

Will you tell me what my manager is probably thinking about my resume objective and this awesome Product X from Company Y....

I do wish more people would identify their posteriorities (as Drucker called them).

Anonymous said...

To complement what Deirdre said, I think that people who do those things don't even read blog posts - they just find a blog and ask away. Therefore, I don't think there will be any decrease in the number of ridiculous requests like the ones AAM mentioned.

Rebecca said...

Posteriorities! I love it! Thanks, Office Humorist, for that Word of the Day.

Bridget said...

In some of what I've read on your blog, you give some very good advice. I believe you lose your credibility when you use words such as "sucks" and "hell" in conversation.

Ask a Manager said...

Really? I guess I'm not bothered by that.