is it cheesy to send a thank-you on animal-themed stationary?

A reader writes:

I recently applied for a job at an animal care facility, and I made sure to note in my cover letter than I'm a compassionate animal (and people) person in hopes that this will show my personality and also put my resume at the top of the pile. If (hopefully when) I land an interview with this company, I plan on sending out a handwritten thank-you note afterwards. Is it too cheesy to write my note on animal-themed stationery if I keep it tasteful? I want to stand out from the crowd, but not in a bad way. What are your thoughts?

I say this as someone who used to work for an animal charity:  Skip the animal-themed stationary. Go with something more professional.

I keep saying that gimmicks don't work; what makes you stand out is being a really strong candidate.  If you're thinking of trying something to make yourself stand out that doesn't really relate to your qualifications for the job, that's a good sign that you might be going too far afield.

is it possible to send an interview thank-you note too quickly?

A reader writes:

I have a question about thank-you letters after an interview. In today's world of cell phones being able to do email, I can actually have the thank-you letter sent before I even leave the interviewer's office. I literally just said thank-you and shook hands three minutes ago, and am sending the thank-you email already?

I try to include a comment about the conversation to try and remind them or to stay on their radar, but for the most part I can have the thank-you ready to go in a minute.

I recently adopted the rule that I should wait until the end of the day to send the thank-you. What do you think is the appropriate time frame for thank-you letters?

Well, first, any thank-you note is better than no thank-you note, regardless of timing. But since you asked: Wait at least a few hours. Any time between say, 5 and 48 hours post-interview is perfect. (But again, I'm only nitpicking because you asked!)

The reason it's not ideal to send it just minutes after leaving the interviewer's office is because it can feel a bit perfunctory -- you haven't even had time to reflect yet, you probably had the email or a template all ready to go before you even came to the interview, and you're just checking off an item on your to-do list. And that may all be the case, but if you're obvious about it, it feels less genuine.

From the interviewer's perspective, the thank-you note doesn't just signal manners; more importantly, it signals interest. I want to know that the job candidate went home, thought about what we talked about, digested it all, and concluded that she's still enthusiastic about the position. That's what getting a thank-you note tells me -- as long as enough time has passed for that to be realistic.

must I send thank-you's to all 5 of my interviewers?

A reader writes:

I interviewed at a company where I met with 5 different people. Am I supposed to write and send a thank you card to each person I met with, or only the one person who is making the hiring decision and would potentially be my boss?

Well, you don't have to, but it's a nice touch and it'll be noticed. You have the chance to generate this conversation:

Person A: I got a nice thank-you note from Jane Smith.
Person B: So did I! She must have sent them to all of us. I really like that.

That doesn't mean that you will always generate that conversation, but if you have the opportunity to stand out as well-mannered/classy/memorable, why not take it?

That said, job-seekers don't need yet another obligation to stress out over, and if you don't do it, it's not a big deal. And thank-you notes don't get you the job on their own. But they contribute to an overall picture of a candidate, so why not do it?

should I send flowers after a job interview?

A reader writes:

I was just wondering if you think it's a good idea to send flowers after an interview for a thank you.

It's a nice thought, but no -- it's too much.

I know it can feel differently, but an employer is not doing you a favor by interviewing you. They are hoping that you will be the right match for their open position. The relationship -- although I know it never feels this way -- should be a roughly equal one. You are both having a conversation to try to figure out whether you'd each like to embark upon a relationship, one that you'd both benefit from.

And there's a less abstract argument against it too: It could come across as a bit desperate, because it's too strong of a gesture.

Stick with a thank-you note.

should employers respond to job-seekers' post-interview thank-you notes?

A reader writes:

What's the etiquette of responding to a job candidate's thank you note? Is this the right thing for employers to do?

Every time I go for an interview, I always send out a thank you email, normally on the same day. Some companies/people I interview with were kind enough to respond to my thank you, but mostly just don't. From past experience though, it never really means anything as far as whether or not I get the job, since I got jobs from the non-responsive companies, and did not get jobs from those who responded. But when companies/people respond to my thank you notes, even if I didn't get the job at the end, it always gives me a positive impression about them.

What's your take on this?

You know what's weird? I went years without ever being asked this question, and now I've been asked it numerous times in the last two months. I can't figure out why. In any case...

I do not think courtesy demands that employers send a thank-you in response to your thank-you. I think of it like gift etiquette, where if someone sends you a thank-you note for your gift, you're not expected to then send them a thank-you for their thank-you. If you were, it could become an endless cycle, and we would all just keep thanking each other over and over and have no time to watch Top Chef.

(And imagine if you had to do it with thank-you's that arrived by mail rather than email. It would get time-consuming.)

That said, it's certainly a kind and gracious gesture to reply to a candidate's thank-you note. When I have the time (which isn't always the case), I'll sometimes reply with something like, "It was great meeting you as well, and we'll be in touch soon." But again, I think this is optional, and I wouldn't read anything into it when employers don't do it.

Anyone want to argue that it's obligatory?

saying thank-you after getting job rejection feedback

If you ask someone who rejected you for a job for feedback about how you could do better next time and that person takes the time to respond, you really, really should follow up with at least a "thank you."

Giving that feedback is not obligatory, and many employers ignore those requests. If someone takes the time to help you, that person is doing you a favor. You should thank them.

When I take the time to help someone with feedback and get silence in return, I remember it.

thanking boss after getting laid off

A reader writes:

I have been at my job for 11 months and the company laid off everyone but 2 people because of the slow economy (22 people in all). I was one of the ones laid off. I absolutely loved the job. Would it be proper to write a thank you note to the boss/owner thanking him for the employment opportunity that I had with them? (It is a family owned business.)

It's certainly not necessary, but it would be an incredibly kind and gracious thing to do.

Laying people off is very hard, and I can only imagine how it feels to have to take one's family business from 24 people to 2 people. Generally laid-off employees are understandably focused on the impact on themselves -- of course -- but if you're thinking of your boss as well, I'm sure he would be really grateful to receive a note like that right now.

And not only is it a really nice thing to do, but it might actually pay off in the future, in terms of him helping you with job leads or being the first on his list to call if business picks back up ... but mainly it's just really nice.

thank-you note for not being laid off?

A reader writes:

My husband has been successfully employed by the same company for 13 years. Due to the economic climate, the company has been forced to lay-off 14% of their staff. Fortunately, my husband’s job has been spared, and at least for the moment, we feel that his job is secure. Would it be appropriate for me, his wife, to write a thank-you note to his employer expressing my gratitude for my husband’s employment? This company has always been very good to us and I feel as though this would be a genuine gesture, but am not sure how professional it would appear.

It's an understandable impulse, but you, as the wife of the employee, should not write a thank-you note to the company. As a spouse, you really shouldn't have any official interaction with the company, and a thank-you note for employing your husband would come off strangely. Your husband should interact with the company on his own behalf. (And remember, the company isn't doing charity work; they're presumably employing your husband for good reason.)

However, your husband could certainly tell his manager how much he appreciates working at the company -- couched not in terms of the economy but rather in terms of whatever he does truly enjoy about the company. Any manager in this situation would appreciate hearing an employee affirming that he loves his job.