does a request for my references mean anything?

A reader writes:

I know you've answered a plethora of questions regarding references.... but. I had a phone interview last week with the person who would be my hiring manager (VP of Marketing). It went very well, and she invited me into the office for an on-site interview. The on-site interview entailed interviewing with first the Marketing Director, followed by the Marketing Manager whom I would be replacing, and then lastly with the VP Marketing who I phone interviewed with and would be my boss.

The interview overall went very well. When I was having my last interview with the VP Marketing who'd be my boss, she closed the interview by asking me to email her a list of references! I did so that night. However, the VP was clearly unable to gain feedback from the other 2 interviewers because they were all back to back in the same day. I'm being optimistic... but how common is it for someone at the VP level to ask for references if they are not serious about hiring you? It's been 3 days and I'm getting antsy. I know my references haven't been called, because I've been following up with them.

I know you aren't a clairvoyant psychic, but if you could, please provide some insight as to how common it is for interviewers to ask for references, and then do nothing? Never check them? Either because someone better has come along? Or it was just a formality? I do have a feeling that I was one of the first people that they interviewed based on their answers to my questions (a little uncertain of themselves with their reply to say a question about what the preferred method of communication is within the team?) When would it be appropriate to follow up? And if so, shall I mention that they haven't checked my references?

Okay, calm down. You're doing that thing that people sometimes do after a date where they micro-analyze every word to try to figure out whether the other person liked them or not.

The reference request, I'm sorry to say, probably doesn't mean much of anything.

Many interviewers ask for references at the end of an interview as a matter of routine, unless the candidate completely bombed. This is so that once they are ready to pick a finalist and check references, they don't lose any time; they already have the info they need to make the calls. If you want, in the future when you're supplying references, you can say, "Can you give me an idea of when my references could expect to hear from you? That way I can make sure they're available, or supply alternate ones if they're not going to be." Often that will elicit useful information, such as "We generally only call references of our finalists, and we'll know who our finalists are and start calling references next week."

By the way, even if you are their top candidate, three days is nothing. These things often take a while. Did you ask them what their timeline is for next steps? It's really important to ask that at the end of an interview, because it will save you from obsessing over why they haven't gotten back to you yet, when in fact they might not even be planning to move forward for three weeks.

(And I've vowed not to answer any more questions about how to follow up because I've answered it enough to bore myself and probably others, but you can find information on following up here.)

And last, no, do not point out to them that they haven't checked your references yet. They know that.

Calm down, breathe, distract yourself with other things. Good luck!

how do I explain depression to prospective employers?

A reader writes:

I have bipolar depression, and I am starting to interview for jobs. I recently graduated college but my grades suffered toward the end of my education because of bipolar depression. It affected me for one year before I was diagnosed. I am now starting the job interview process and wondering what to say about my GPA dip, and semester withdrawal. My early college career went very well, but suffered towards the end. My overall GPA suffered, but my major GPA remained at 3.00. It was the bipolar depression that made my grades suffer, not excessive partying.

How do I talk about this issue with future employers, or do I not bring it up? I am on medication now and have been doing much better. I received A's and B's my last semester after starting the medication. What do I say or do in an interview?

Treat it like any other health issue, and explain that you had health issues during that time that affected your grades, but that the problem was resolved and your grades returned to their previously high levels.

That said, many, many, many employers won't care about your GPA anyway and it'll never even come up. So don't stress too much about this. In fact, you could even just leave it off your resume; if someone cares about it, they'll ask, and you can give them this context simultaneously. Good luck!

how to list temp work on a resume

A reader writes:

Do you have any thoughts on how to list temporary work on a resume? I've been reading Ask a Manager for about a year now, and I can't even tell you how much it's helped me in my transition from college student/intern to professional. I always really appreciate that your thoughtful, honest advice, so I'd really like to know what you think.

I graduated in spring 2009, but have yet to find a permanent job in my chosen field. I'm still looking, but I've also been working through a temp agency to fill the gap. My question is: How do you, as a manager, like to see temporary work listed on a resume? Is there any way I can use it to my advantage?

I'm concerned that 1) it reflects badly on me that I have yet to find permanent employment 2) I don't want to crowd out my more relevant internship experience by listing a number of less relevant, although more recent, temp jobs.

I know you're really busy, so I understand if you don't have time to reply. However, I just want to say again how much I appreciate your blog. It should be required reading for every young professional!

It should, shouldn't it?

There are a couple of different ways to list temp work on a resume, which I'll get to in a minute. But first let me address your concern that it reflects poorly on you that you haven't found permanent employment yet: It does not. The job market has been horrible for a while now. Recent grads, in particular, are having a tremendously tough time. For most of them, it's not their fault. As I've written before, for a lot of people right now, it's not about them; it's about math. Any hiring manager who doesn't recognize that is an ass.

Okay, so back to how to list temp work. It depends on how long-term your assignments are. If you've had some relatively long-term assignments (more than a couple of weeks in one place), I'd list it like this:

Acme Architecture (via Temps Inc.) -- August - October 2009

If your assignments have been more short-term, then I'd list the temp company itself as the employer, followed by a list of bullet points of the types of responsibilities you've had at various companies through them. Like with anything on your resume, make sure you really sell what you've been doing during that time.

Good luck!

HR told me they're taking a risk in hiring me

A reader writes:

I recently received a job offer from the HR person of the company that I interviewed with. She said "they are taking a risk in hiring me and offering me the job." I thought it was a strange statement.

When the managers in that company discuss me, they can say "OK, let's take a risk and hire this person." But would a HR make that statement to a candidate when offering the job?

I think it is a negotiation tactic so that I won't ask for a higher salary, work my ass off to prove I am not a risky person, and don't ask for raise for a couple of years.

What is your opinion? Interested to know.

It's one of two things. Either it's a negotiation tactic, like you suspect, designed to make you not ask for more money, or it's an awkward attempt at a compliment. I can think of a couple of times when I've said to a candidate who knew her experience was on the light side, "We had candidates with more experience than you, but ultimately we were really impressed with your ____ and think you would excel in the job." It's possible that the HR person was going for something like that and screwed up the delivery.

On the other hand, do you think you're a risk? If it's clear that you're not the traditional ideal candidate for the role but you pushed for them to take a risk on a new approach, then maybe she was just acknowledging that. But if that were the case, you probably wouldn't be asking me.

And frankly, the reality is that every hire is a risk to one degree or another. People can blow you away in an interview and then crash and burn once on the job. But hiring managers don't normally feel the need to remind candidates of that when making an offer.

my company promised me a raise and won't come through

A reader writes:

I started a job at $10 an hour. I took the job because I needed income, and wasn't planning to stay for very long. I liked it, because it was a 10 minute drive to work, and steady pay. I was offered another job that would be $14 an hour, but it was a 30 minute drive. I offered the place I was working a chance to keep me on by meeting the offer, because I liked the office and the short drive.

My boss's reponse was this email:

We would like to keep you as an Administrative Assistant with BUSINESS. I can offer you a full-time position as an Administrative Assistant but only at the $12.00 per hour mark right now due to the limited duties. Once we finish the mailings which should be in a month or so (based on your speediness), we will have the option to increase you to your desired wage of $14.00 per hour. I will have HR manager put a formal promotion letter for the Administrative Assistant position in place to you by tomorrow. Please confirm that you will be staying and that you are accepting this promotion. Thank you.

Well, this was well over a month ago. Plus, during this time, I've been taking on a lot of additional duties, and we've moved the office (in a very quick and unexpected move) so that my current commute is now 35 minutes. We moved because the rent would be much lower and would save the company a lot of money.

I asked my boss about the raise and was told it might be two months now... and to ask again in a couple days. I asked again in a couple days and I've been told that the company can't afford it right now. I'd just have to stay at $12 an hour.

I'd like to know if I have any recourse open to me, legally, about getting the raise I've earned. Or should I just start looking for another job?

I'm not a lawyer, and you may want to consult one, but at a minimum, this is terribly unfair: You turned down a job specifically because they made you a promise to increase your rate of pay. It sounds like you have that in writing.

There may be a legal issue here. On the other hand, even if there is, you can pretty much expect your relationship with your employer to go to hell if you bring in a lawyer. (Fair? No. Reality? Yes.)

I'd handle it this way: Go to your boss and explain that you're very concerned because you turned down another offer at their request, specifically because they offered you a pay increase. Say that you turned down the more lucrative position because your boss gave you her word, and you're asking her to honor it, since you accepted it in good faith.

Now, I suppose it's possible that the company really is in such dire financial straits that they can no longer afford to make good on their promise -- in which case, you'll need to decide whether or not you want to stay. But if they can't afford to pay you this extra $80/week, I'd be questioning whether you or any of their employees have much job security anyway.

did I blow my chances in this phone interview?

A reader writes:

I received an email on one of my job applications around 4:45pm. The HR Manager asked that I called back to her in regards to the position because she would like to "discuss the position and my qualifications." As I applied through a generic job board, I had not left a phone number for her to call back.

I was at a very busy coffeeshop, but looking at the time-constraint in the evening, I called her back immediately anticipating that we would schedule an interview at the company sometime the next day.

The call did not go to the voicemail and she picked up the phone immediately. She asked me if I have time for a few question, which I said yes to. Minutes into the conversation, I realized she was giving me a full-blown interview, asking me questions like "Why do I like this industry?", "When was the last time you turn a customer's experience around?"

I was so taken back that my answers were less than impressive. Furthermore, everyone around me sitting at their laptops were looking and listening to me, causing me unnecessary stress by these personal questions.

I apologized and told her I was not prepared and not in the correct state of mind for the questions, suggesting that I would much prefer to meet face-to-face. She seemed very annoyed, saying "You were the one who called me" and "You said you have time for questions". She also stressed that this was not an interview but only a few questions to know me better. (?)

In the end she said she would take my call again the next day. Although I did the best I could for her questions, admitted mistake, learned from the experience yesterday and apologized repeatedly, I have a feeling she would not call back. When asked the time frame I would get a hear back, she said she could not tell, and there is a chance I won't hear back at all.

I had read all about stress interviews - getting seated in a broken chair, pretending to be completely uninterested, etc. Yet, I feel that I should have a right to be prepared to better connect my strengths and ability to the job.

This struck me as a very bad experience. Any chances of recovery? Should I give up or avoid this company altogether?

I'd move on. It's clear that there was a miscommunication here, but I can understand why she expected you to be ready to answer questions when you called her back; it sounds like she had asked you to call to talk about the position, not to schedule an in-person interview. (Many employers, myself included, do phone screens first and don't want to spend time on an in-person interview until that initial screening has indicated it would be worth the time.)

I don't think this was a stress interview (although it clearly ended up having that effect, unintentionally!). Rather, she assumed that if you were returning the call, you were prepared to talk. At that point, the best thing to do -- if you didn't feel you could proceed with the phone interview -- would have been to apologize and say that you had misunderstood, thought that she was calling to schedule an interview, and that you weren't currently somewhere where you could talk for long.

You said you feel that you "should have a right to be prepared to better connect your strengths and ability to the job." In hiring, you don't really have a right to anything, other than to not be subjected to illegal discrimination. Aside from that, employers can be as fair or unfair as they want (assuming they're non-union, non-government). But in this case, I don't even think that you even confronted unfairness -- just a misunderstanding. And as I've written before, little things necessarily take on disproportionate importance during these screenings, because the employer has so little information to go on.

The best thing you can do here is to move on with a better understanding of how to handle this in the future. Good luck!

my boss is hostile and abusive and won't train me

A reader writes:

I recently stumbled across your blog and love it! I have read through many of your posts looking for advice on terrible, micromanaging bosses who communicate poorly, yell and belittle frequently, and seem to play favorites in the office.

I've been here less than a year and have never received any formal training. I was told that I was hired at a high level and should "just know". When I press for details or clarity, it is met with tremendous frustration and ridicule by the boss. I have had no experience in the industry and my boss knew that when she hired me. I get yelled at on a day to day basis. I am told my decisions are poor and that I don't look at the big picture. My boss frequently has other employees check my work. It's always degrading.

I can't really figure out the issues and have actually tried to ask her directly and have been open to feedback. Asking questions only inspires more hostility, so I've given up. I'm not even performing the type of work that was described to me during my job interview. I am trying to just keep a low profile as I search for other work.

Since the economy is so poor, I'm anticipating having to put up with more of this abuse for at least a few more months. I just want to make it as painless as possible. I can't really afford to be unemployed at this point. My question... much of your advice involves bringing HR into the situation. So, where do you go if the boss, the Senior Director of HR, is the problem?

Actually, I avoid recommending HR for issues like this. I'm a big fan of trying to work things out directly with your manager -- because while some HR types can help in situations like this, a lot can't ... and when you don't find that out until after you've already gone to them, it can poison the relationship with your boss further. So you really, really want to ask yourself what you know about what sort of track record you've seen HR (or in your case, another higher-level manager, someone senior to your boss) have with other people in situations like this. If you know they're discreet, fair, and willing to intervene when someone is being mistreated, ask for help. But if you aren't sure, be aware that it's a gamble.

Here's what I think is going on, based on the information here: Your boss hired someone without experience to do a job that requires experience, or at least training. And your boss is not just a jerk, but also a bad manager. And as a result, she's taking a problem of her own making -- hiring someone without the necessary experience -- and taking it out on you.

Yelling is never acceptable. Refusing to give you feedback or answer questions? Pretty much shooting herself in the foot, guaranteeing that the problems that are causing her so much frustration are going to continue. Keeping an employee who is clearly struggling, but not actually handling the situation (whether through coaching or training or even just candid conversations)? Really bad management. Dereliction of duty, in fact.

Because it's possible that you are indeed a really bad fit for this job. But a good manager would either provide you with training and coaching, and/or would have clear and straightforward conversations with you about what you need to be doing differently (eventually leading to a candid conversation about whether continued tenure in the role makes sense). But just keeping you around and being abusive? That screams "bad manager who doesn't know how to do her job."

(By the way, having others check your work and assigning you different tasks than what you were hired to do may be a reasonable response to realizing that you're not excelling at the work. But certainly not without talking to you about what's going on and why.)

So what do you do, while you're looking for another job? It's tough to say. If your boss were a better manager, the path would be pretty clear -- talk with her candidly about her obvious frustration, ask for feedback, and probably take the steps in this post on what to do if you think you're going to get fired.

But she's not a good manager, and speaking assertively with her about the situation might lead to her either exacting revenge further or just firing you. My best advice -- and it's not a great option -- is to document what's going on, so that if she does fire you, you have documentation of the fact that you've asked repeatedly for training and feedback but were refused and that she behaves abusively toward you. This could come in handy for (a) ensuring that you're eligible to collect unemployment in case the company contests it and (b) getting the company (someone over her head) to agree not to give you a negative reference.

And last, as you're looking forward to your next job, look back and ask yourself whether -- in retrospect -- you could have done anything to have avoided this situation before accepting the job. Were there warning signs? Did you not ask many questions about the training that you'd need? Did you not talk about the manager's style? Not to blame the victim, of course, and plenty of employers misrepresent things during the hiring process, but it's worth asking if there are ways to avoid a similar situation in the future.

I'm sorry you're dealing with this and hope you get out soon. Good luck!